Commitment Issues

My parents started dating during their middle school years and have been happily side-by-side ever since. My evidence for the “happily” modifier is stated in the next few sentences. They groped each other nightly while doing the dinner dishes during my high school years. He’s done the vacuuming for the last 20 years because it hurt her back. She retrieves voicemail messages from his phone since he never learned how. They play card games after dinner. They’re silly. They watch and cheer as the other plays nickel slots in AC (now if THAT doesn’t scream love…) Once when I was in college, my father told me that if he had it to do over again, he still would have picked her, he’s been a pretty lucky guy. Aww. You’d think that these two would have the commitment thing down, right?

Enter the EZ Pass…

Rog (my dad) was kind enough to hand over his truck for the season so that I might make it safely through an Ithaca winter (if only all my problems could be so easily solved by 4-wheel drive!). As I was driving his truck back to Ithaca the day before 2nd semester, I checked to make sure his EZ Pass was inside. One would expect to find said device attached to the windshield, a little to the right of the rearview mirror. Oh, no, not in Rog’s truck. Committing to industrial strength Velcro is not a place he wants to go. I believe past excuses include: it will block my view and this way we can easily transfer it from car to car.

His EZ Pass sits perched on the dash. The observant reader might be questioning how the device stays in place on the dashboard. Let me explain… My father obtained some sort of non-slip, spongy material that he cut (yes, he got a tool involved) to create a 4”x8” home for his EZ Pass. I’m not sure what the material is called, nor where one would find it in a Target. My point here is that this process took effort, way more than peeling the back off Velcro strips, but I won’t judge.

Please understand that the current situation is an improvement from the one that reigned several years ago. My father would see a sign that he was approaching a toll booth. He would yell to my mom, “get the EZ Pass, get the EZ Pass.” She would fumble inside the glove compartment before victoriously emerging with the shiny protective-foil-wrapped (who keeps those things?) transponder. A brief argument would ensue about which person would hold (uh-huh, I said “hold”) the EZ Pass while driving through the detector. Even then their love shone through, as usually each would have a hand on it, pressed against the windshield where they imagined the Velcro strips might be located. Ah, the good old days.

I kid, of course, as these are two of the coolest, most generous people I will ever know. Their quirks only add to their appeal. In a week, I will get my own car back--the EZ Pass fastened securely via hooks and loops to the windshield. Unlike my father, I can commit!

…we’ll leave the discussion of my empty passenger’s seat for another blog post ;)